Like Chocolate for Lent....

Tomorrow is Ash Wednesday. Which for Catholics signifies the beginning of Lent--the holiest time of the year. A time of self-sacrifice, repentance, contrition and forgiveness. For the duration of 40 days, with the culmination being Easter and the rising of our Lord, all believers are meant to go inside of themselves and address their flaws. More importantly, we are meant to pick something to give up to God for Lent--a sacrifice to make us worthy. And why not? Jesus made the ultimate sacrifice for us on the cross; what is giving up meat on Fridays and a personal sacrifice of our own choice? This sacrifice is something we give of our own free-will and is happily given. Really, it's easy.

 

Or so most would believe.

Ok it is a lot.

Trust me, I do not consider myself an ardent Catholic or believer of sorts. I don't speak about religion,I rarely come out and say that I am in fact Catholic, hardly go to Mass (even on Sundays) and am more than willing to admit that in college I went to Mass every Sunday solely because I was on vocal scholarship and had to sing. Pretty harsh, I admit but I have my own issues with the church which will need to be saved for another blog. In reality, the experience of Catholic school beat the living faith out of me--for lack of a better term. Having religion jammed down your throat for years with no choice in the matter is assuredly not the way to keep the faithless, faithful.

All this being said, I still try and give up something for Lent. Maybe out of habit. Maybe for a sense of accomplishment. Maybe a teeny bit of faith comes in to play. But every year I grapple with picking something to give up. The trick of the matter is to pick something good, something that shows fortitude and strength. The better the sacrifice the braver you are. This was also instilled in me from a young age.

Usually the week before Ash Wednesday, my grade-school would decorate the hallways with banners declaring the sacrifices of its' students. I'm not sure if it was a "Big Brother is Always Watching" mentality, where the students were supposed to actively watch each other for slip-ups and report it back, but that's usually what happened. It was like an active competition--waiting for someone to eat the snack they had given up.

Part of Lent for kids was also daring to give up the most difficult thing you could think of. Something that would win the respect of teachers and admiration of your peers. Like there was always one kid in your class who declared "For Lent, I will not watch TV." Which at the time my chin would drop and "Wow" would be mouthed, wordlessly. But, come on now people, what 10 year old do you know would actually be able to go through with it? There is no way those "brave kids" actually stopped watching TV for 40 days. Sorry. It's not possible in our day and age.

But it was all the thrill and the talk of the sacrifice.

Usually I gave up chocolate. Equally as big as TV for a young kid. I would proudly hand my decorated banner back to my teacher every year, declaring "For Lent, I give up chocolate."

But I had a secret then. A pretty sly and un-catholiclike secret.

I hate chocolate.

I have never liked chocolate. It actually makes me sick. Have you ever been to Max Brenner's downtown? Yeah, full on Willy Wonka. I have been there twice and felt physically sick each and every time. Gag reflux and all. But...that's why I always "sacrificed" it for Lent--because it had the shock value that a kid could respect, and it took no effort on my part. It was the easiest thing for me. I usually made a big scene now and again and would pack a bar or two in my lunch and painfully give it away, but it was all apart of the act. Total cop out on my part, but I was young and didn't truly understand the true meaning of Lent.

And okay.....I kept doing it until I was like 13. So sue me!

Obviously the non-sacrifice, sacrifice isn't cute anymore. If I really want to participate in this one aspect of my faith, I actually have to give up something significant. But thinking of something good is just as difficult.

Here are my options:
1. Beer
     Which is an automatic no considering March is national "Get Drunk Month," with St. Patty's day and all.
2.Cursing  
      Yeah....If you've met me, you'd know the impossibility of this. It's basically in my natural vernacular. I'd fail in a day
3. Gossiping
      I'm a woman. Hello.

Obviously none of the above will work. I want to pick something that's actually possible. Difficult. Difficult. Difficult.

Fuck it.
I'm giving up Fast Food and that will be the end of it. I love me some McDonalds and Chik-fila but the sacrifice can be financially and healthily beneficial.

So wish me luck! Happy Lent!