The Tale of the Haunted DDD

I'm pretty sure everyone in the world has a ghost or supernatural story they love to tell to friends. It could be a creepy experience that happened to them or to "my sister's best friend's mom's third cousin's ex-wife"--and reciting that exact connection is always important to the story. Usually these tales are a bit embellished for dramatic purposes--"And I swear, I felt something pass right through my body" or "I have the picture to prove it!"--and most of these tales would be considered a "Big Fish" Story; where the story has been so twisted that even you start to believe it. The listener doesn't really know if the story is real or just a figment of the teller's imagination, but really it doesn't matter. These stories are always incredibly entertaining and really gets you thinking, "Wow...maybe there is another plain of existence for the dead."

I don't know about you, but this is the exact scene that I think of when I mention "other plains of existence for the dead." And if you don't recognize this.....well, shame on you!

Truthfully, I don't have one of those stories. I know! Very shocking as I pride myself on my story-telling abilities. But really, I've never experienced something so spooky that I attributed it to the supernatural or a ghost. I've never had things mysteriously levitate before my eyes, seen an apparition floating in a graveyard or on an abandoned highway, or heard voices in an empty house. And trust me, I've tried! I love that kind of shit! And will even seek out creepy places--like Byberry Insane Asylum, that's right by my house and apparently one of the most haunted places in Philadelphia--just to try and catch a glimpse of something creepy.

The only thing I can contribute my lack of supernatural occurrences is the fact that I haven't really had a lot of death in my life. I don't have a relative or a friend who I was very close with die suddenly--the only being my maternal grandfather when I was 6, but I have very few memories of him to begin with. Sure, I've had great-uncles or acquaintances die unexpectedly, but I don't feel like any of these would require someone to haunt me, or linger on with the need to speak to me. Not that I don't have departed people who I would love to speak with again--there's actually one in particular who I wish would visit me--but it just hasn't happened.

Well Sunday night I had something incredibly weird and freaky happen to me and I can't think of a reasonable explanation. I don't know if it was truly supernatural, but it definitely scared the shit out of me.

On a whim, I decided to drive to Reading to visit a friend from college who was home visiting his parents. I really had nothing going on, so I didn't think much of making the hour drive at 6:45 at night to a place I had never been to, when it was also pitch dark outside. Probably wasn't the best idea, but luckily I have a GPS and I always trust it with my life. And I'm not kidding--I literally could not function without it. My parents gave it to me for Christmas one year, as I am constantly getting lost which usually leads to massive panic attacks. So, the GPS was a way of saying, "Here, use this. Stop calling us, hysterically crying when you get lost 2 miles from home." It's pretty bad, I'll admit. But the GPS puts my frantic mind at ease when I am driving somewhere new.

Mine is NOT this nice

And an hour later, I got to my friend's house with no problems.

We hung out for about 3 hours, but it being a Sunday and me being in the real world, I knew I had to leave at a somewhat decent hour because I had work the next day--and an hour long drive ahead of me. Didn't want to leave, but I knew I had to be on the road by the latest 10:30. So at 10:15, I jumped into my trusty PT Cruiser, but the key in the ignition, punched my home address into my reliable GPS, and pulled out of his neighborhood.

Easy enough.

Until my GPS had a seizure.

Within 2 minutes of pulling onto the Pottstown Bypass, the screen of my GPS went blank, turned off and then turned back on. It stayed frozen on the welcome screen for a few minutes, then the GPS lady started yelling out directions but didn't show anything on the screen. Then it went off again, turned on and sat on the "Calculating Distance" screen for another eternity. Again, the GPS lady  (or bitch as I started calling her) starting screaming at me to "MERGE ONTO THE POTTSTOWN BYPASS"--which I was already on. Naturally, I started to panic. I pulled over on the side of the road, thinking maybe I'd turn it off for a few minutes and allow whatever glitch to figure itself out. I stayed there for a few minutes, then turned it back on. I re-entered my home address and allowed the map to load. Everything seemed fine so I pulled back onto the road.

Then it crapped out on me 3 more times.

I didn't know what to do, so I pulled over again--this time in an abandoned parking lot--and turned it off. I was incredibly tempted to just chuck the damn thing out the window and head back to my friends. On top of that, I had just watched an episode of COPS where a girl was parked in an abandoned parking lot on the phone, the cop thought it was suspicious and came up to her and hauled her in for a warrant. Not that I have anything on my record or was doing anything bad, but having a cop shine a bright flashlight into your face is not appealing.

I figured I had to at least take my chances. So I pulled back onto the bypass and started to drive--I knew I was on that road for awhile and it eventually led to the turnpike. At least I hoped. My DDD ("demon direction device") continued to freak out. Now it was just flashing the word "AHEAD" over and over again. I still attempted to tap the screen and replug my address in, but it was having none of it.

And like a sign from God, I saw the overhead sign that read "PA TURNPIKE".

"Thank you Jesus!" I screamed and sped down  the highway. Literally hauled ass to the safety of the turnpike, where at least I knew where I was going--literally just straight, can't screw that up. I merged onto the turnpike lane, went through the toll, and drove forward to my entrance.

I'm not even kidding you, the second that I turned onto the turnpike the DDD flashed and everything was fine. The map was on the screen, the GPS lady (yes, she was a lady again) was talking calmer (in my mind anyway) and it was giving me correct directions. I was on my guard, waiting for it to spazz out again but the rest of my ride was completely uneventful.

Too uneventful.

Which got me thinking.....

Was something tapping into my GPS? Was there someone in my car deliberating causing it to go haywire and stall me? Was my GPS possessed?

I have never had an issue with it before--sure it has taken me on asinine back routes, but all GPS's do that to an extent. Yes, it's about 3 years old, but I rarely use it. Also, when I'm not using it, it is safely packed away in my glove compartment so it wasn't overcharged or burned out either. And if there was truly something wrong with it, why would it all of a sudden be fine again?

Makes absolutely no sense.

Maybe something was with me that night....protecting me from something on the road. Or just screwing with me for the fun of it.

I'll never know.

But I still get goosebumps thinking about it.