Okay....
Just me and you here.
Just me and you.
It isn't hard, really it isn't. Just remember everything from two minutes ago and you'll be fine.
Really hope those urban legends are wrong.
Hope that cranberry juice cleared it all out.
Oh god, what if it didn't!
Okay....
Gotta keep focused and not think about all that.
Hafta relax and let it out. Think of something relaxing. Like I'm on a beach somewhere sipping a chilled margarita. Not lime. Hate Lime. Threw up for hours the last time I had a lime one. It was in DC. May have been because I was drunk....and had 5.
Strawberry. Strawberry is safe.
And here we go!
Oh!
Oh!
Oh!
Aim! Aim!
Wow this is hard!
Please aim!
Okay....okay it's going in.
Ewwww! This is gross!
Okay...
Hafta fill it to the line. Not under the line. The line or over. Or I'll hafta wait 3 hours to take it again. And there's no way in hell I'm doing this again.
Almost
There
Almost
DONE!
Phew....okay made it to the line!
Ew....this is warm.
Gross. Ew!
Okay there was one more thing I had to do....Jesus I have no short term memory.
Shit......*hand gestures to the lever*
SHIT! No! No flushing! Just back away and resist the urge! It's not impolite when you're told not to.
Alright....all done here.
Just try not to spill....
Manuevering this door handle will be a problem....okay just put my purse on the floor and push down.
Okay.
*Smile and hand jar to waiting nurse*
I wonder if she's as grossed out as I am. Ew. It's warm and really yellow. This is so embarassing. I hope this is it....
"Wait......how long for the results?"
Fuck.
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